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What is Bullying?



The American Psychological Association defines bullying as, “a form of aggressive behavior in which someone intentionally and repeatedly causes another person injury or discomfort.1


Bullying can take several forms. Some are more pronounced, while others can be subtle. No matter the form of bullying, mistreatment of any kind can cause significant distress or harm to another.


HelpGuide.org shares three main categories of bullying, including 2:

  • Physical Bullying

  • Verbal Bullying

  • Relational Bullying

  • Cyberbullying


Each form of bullying is stemmed from a bully’s desire for power. Yet, the platform or environment in which it occurs, as well as the form of torment varies.


Physical bullying is characterized by hitting, kicking, or causing any physical damage to another person’s body. It may or may not be paired with verbal, relational, or cyberbullying.


Verbal bullying is characterized by a verbal defamation of another person. This can be cruel statements about an individual’s looks, personality, affiliations, religion, orientation, or a host of any other personal features.


Relational bullying is characterized by exclusion or relational positioning in which someone’s desire for belonging is used against them. Although physical contact is not generally paired with this form of bullying, the negative impact can be significant.


Cyberbullying is characterized by cruel online communication either in social media platforms, website comments, messaging forums, or a host of other digital spaces. Cyberbullying presents additional problems for the bullied in that online forums provide access for thousands to witness damaging statements.


If you, or someone you care for, are being bullied, I want you to know it is valid if you feel pain, whether or not that pain is physical. While the goal of a bully is to diminish another in order to gain a sense of power, your identity comes from more than anything a person or group of people do or say.


I am here to let you know you are more, and your story— is far from over.

What Is Bullying? - Video Discussion



What Is Adult Bullying?





Though we may be tempted to believe bullying is an adolescent issue, up to 31% of adults in a recent survey reported being bullied, in which the bullying was defined as being subjected to repeated, negative behavior intended to harm or intimidate. 3


BullyingStatistics.org names several types of adult bullies, including 4:

  • Narcissistic Adult Bully

  • Impulsive Adult Bully

  • Physical Bully

  • Verbal Assault Bully

  • Secondary Adult Bully


These forms of mistreatment can commonly occur online in the home, or in the workplace. Forbes released an article stating survey statistics showed up to 75% of workers reported some form of workplace bullying 5 and has numerous tips for how to handle mistreatment within the workplace available here: 75% Of Workers Are Being Bullied


Thier follow up article, “How To Atop A Workplace Bully In Their Tracks” also provides powerful tips.


How Many Individuals Struggle?



  • Among high school students, 15.5% are cyberbullied and 20.2% are bullied on school property.6

  • Only 40–50% of cyberbullying targets are aware of the identity of the perpetrator.7

  • A meta-analysis found that students facing peer victimization are 2.2 times more likely to have suicide ideation and 2.6 times more likely to attempt suicide than students not facing victimization.

  • A slightly higher portion of female than of male students report being bullied at school (23% vs. 19%). In contrast, a higher percentage of male than of female students report being physically bullied (6% vs. 4%) and threatened with harm (5% vs. 3%).9

  • Bullied students reported that bullying occurred in the following places: the hallway or stairwell at school (42%), inside the classroom (34%), in the cafeteria (22%), outside on school grounds (19%), on the school bus (10%), and in the bathroom or locker room (9%).9

  • 31% of adults in a recent survey reported being bullied.3

  • 75% of workers reported some form of workplace bullying 5


What Kind Of Help Exists?



Due to the fact bullying is demeaning to an individual’s identity, those who have been victimized may struggle with depression, anxiety, or other mental health battles.


Anything which is locked inside of your thoughts and feelings deserves a place to be processed in a safe environment which can give you actionable guidance and tools.


Additionally, there are a host of tools which can help you find steps to taking action. These include:


· Apps Which Offer Mental Health Support

· Communities With Offer Support

· Finding A Professional


What Kind Of Help Exists? - Video Discussion




How Change Your Narrative Offers Support





It takes courage to begin a journey to seek wholeness. Though many of us will face individual struggles in our own life—there are some struggles which feel as if they have the power to take the pen and write our future. But you are the author—not any pain, brokenness, or hurt of your past and present.


The goal of Change Your Narrative is to create an environment of support along with hosting resources and tools which guide you towards wholeness.


One thought constantly pushes me towards the future. I would ask you the same question:


What if tomorrow was stronger than yesterday?

We are rooting for you, not only once you complete your journey, but every step through it.

If you are looking for a guide to help you process your story and walk a journey of wholeness - we would love to partner with you in the Bullying Matters - Change Your Narrative Video Mentorship Guide.


Check out a sneak peak here:




Communities Which Offer Support





Stomp Our Bullying

https://stompoutbullying.org/#get-help


  • Offers a HelpChat line, parent an educator resources, and a host of educational insight for students and adults.


Stop Bullying

https://www.stopbullying.gov


  • Tips for identifying, standing up to, and planning safety amidst bullying.


Kids Against Bullying http://www.kidsagainstbullying.org


  • Provides a kid-friendly site, with information on what to do if you are a bully or target. Advocates for inclusion.


Cyberbully Hotline http://cyberbullyhotline.com


  • Offers anonymous bully reporting.


Dove

https://www.dove.com/us/en/dove-self-esteem-project.html


  • Provides articles and resources in order to create a community of wholeness.


To Write Love On Her Arms -

https://twloha.com/find-help/


  • Offers a search for free or low cost therapy options to connect with a therapist.


Remedy Live -

https://www.remedylive.com/depression

  • Offers a faith-based videos on mental health issues plus trained advocates ready to connect.


Heads Up Guys -

https://headsupguys.org/take-action/

  • Provides action points and support specifically for men from men.


OK2 Talk -

https://ok2talk.org


  • Offers online support, for teens and young adults who battle mental health.


Resources for Parents



Stomp Our Bullying

https://stompoutbullying.org/get-help/parents-page/


  • Offers a wide range of educational insight into the topics of bullying and what you can do to support your child.


Raising Children – Bullying And School Problems

https://raisingchildren.net.au/for-professionals/mental-health-resources/bullying-school-problems


  • Offers a catalog of parenting articles aimed at addressing the concerns of bullying and cyberbullying.


10 Indications Your Child Is Being Bullied

https://www.activebeat.com/your-health/children/10-indications-that-your-child-is-being-bullied/


  • Offers key indicators to look for to determine if your child is being bullied.


Bullying Action Plan

https://www.pacer.org/publications/bullypdf/BP-25.pdf


  • Teens Against Bullying offers a downloadable PDF worksheet which helps students know how to form an action plan of things they can do.


The Bullying Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Deal with Social Aggression and Cyberbullying

by Raychelle Cassada Lohmann PhD LPC, Julia V. Taylor PhD

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1608824500


  • Provides insight combined with short, actionable prompts to build a circle of support, tools, and healing resources.


My Child Is Being Bullied—What Should I Do?

https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/my-child-is-being-bullied-what-should-i-do/


  • Provides several questions which concerned parents may be asking themselves, along with insight in what to do.


My Child Was Bullied—Here’s What I Did

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2019/05/17/my-child-was-being-bullied-school-heres-what-i-did-what-you-can-do-too/


  • One parent’s story and advice to other parents.


Resources For Ministry Leaders



5 Facts On Bullying Youth Leaders Need To Know

https://theyouthcartel.com/5-facts-on-bullying-youth-leaders-need-to-know/


  • Specific tips on youth workers can use to relationally lead their groups.


How To Identify Adolescent Bullying

http://www.nea.org/home/53359.htm


  • Provides tips for understanding and identifying bullying amongst children and adolescents.


5 Vital Things Youth Workers Should Keep In Mind

https://orangeblogs.org/xp3students/5-vital-things-youth-workers-keep-mind-talking-bullying/


  • Tips on how to stay connected to what is happening in your group.


How To Talk About Bullying – Student Action Plan

https://pacerteensagainstbullying.org/advocacy-for-self/student-action-plan/


  • Teens Against Bullying offers a downloadable PDF worksheet which helps students know how to share their experience of being bullied.


Facing Bullies – A Student Ministry Approach

https://www.youthworker.com/articles/facing-bullies/


  • Takes a non-confrontational approach. Offers Scriptural insight to how to manage emotions and fight back against bullying by not allowing a response—thus yielding power. Provides questions youth workers can ask their students in a group discussion.


Youth Worker Video Round Up – What Do I Do If I Am Being Bullied?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BlMZ66X9ZI&feature=youtu.be


  • 5 youth workers collaborate on a video, targeting students, answering the question, “What do I do when I am bullied?”


10 Free Ways Your Church Can Stop Mental Health Stigma

https://churchandmentalhealth.com/10-free-ways-your-church-can-stop-mental-health-stigma/


  • Offers actionable steps to create a haven of support within your community.


Resources For Teachers



Stomp Out Bullying

https://stompoutbullying.org/get-help/educators-page/


  • Provides a vast library of resources for educators.


Anti-Harassment, Intimidation and Bullying Academic Resources

https://saferschools.ohio.gov/content/anti_harassment_intimidation_and_bullying_resources


  • Ohio State’s model of anti-bulling tools used within their education system. Complete with numerous resources for educators.

How To Identify Adolescent Bullying

http://www.nea.org/home/53359.htm


  • Provides tips for understanding and identifying bullying amongst children and adolescents.


Tips For Talking About Your Mental Health

https://www.mhanational.org/time-talk-tips-talking-about-your-mental-health


  • Includes several prompts which help students get started with beginning an important conversation, including a letter template. Can be utilized as a means for helping young people frame the discussion.


When Bullying Becomes Sexual Harassment

https://stompoutbullying.org/get-help/teens-what-do-about-sexual-harassment/


  • Provides insights for students to understand the gravity of potential sexual harassment. Site page can be used as a discussion piece.


10 Indications A Child Is Being Bullied

https://www.activebeat.com/your-health/children/10-indications-that-your-child-is-being-bullied/


  • Offers key indicators to look for to determine if a child is being bullied.


Resources For Men Battling Depression



Heads Up Guys

https://headsupguys.org/mens-depression/suicide/


  • Site offers male-specific action steps.


Man Therapy

https://mantherapy.org


  • Site uses humor to discuss difficult topics.


Suicide Prevention Resource Center

https://www.sprc.org/populations/men


  • Male-centered mental health resources.


Face It Foundation

https://www.faceitfoundation.org


  • Provides guidance to overcome depression


Your Head: An Owner’s Manual PDF Resource

https://up2sd.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/ownersmanual-1.pdf


  • Printable PDF filled with resources and tools for those wanting to learn more about male mental health issues.



Resources For Teenagers


How To Tell Someone You Are Being Bullied – Student Action Plan

https://pacerteensagainstbullying.org/advocacy-for-self/student-action-plan/


  • Teens Against Bullying offers a downloadable PDF worksheet which helps students know how to share their experience of being bullied.


The Bullying Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Deal with Social Aggression and Cyberbullying

by Raychelle Cassada Lohmann PhD LPC, Julia V. Taylor PhD

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1608824500


  • Provides insight combined with short, actionable prompts to build a circle of support, tools, and healing resources.


When Bullying Becomes Sexual Harassment

https://stompoutbullying.org/get-help/teens-what-do-about-sexual-harassment/


  • Provides insights for students to understand the gravity of potential sexual harassment. Site page can be used as a discussion piece.


Resources For Adults Who Struggle



Adult Bullying: The Epidemic No One Talks About

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_4uB-j-zgQ


  • Kevin discusses his firsthand account and shares research on workplace, family, and adult bullies—and what you can do about it.


How Adult Bullying Impacts Mental And Physical Health

https://health.usnews.com/wellness/mind/articles/2017-12-15/how-adult-bullying-impacts-your-mental-and-physical-heath


How To Handle An Adult Bully In Your Life

https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/20/health/adult-bully-survivor-tips-wellness/index.html


  • Discusses types of bullies and ways to protect yourself.


Keys To Deal With The Family Bully

https://www.verywellfamily.com/dealing-with-the-family-bully-460696


Tips For Handling Adult Bullying In The Workplace

https://lifehacker.com/how-to-handle-being-bullied-as-an-adult-1726099137


  • Provides insight into what this can forms of workplace bullying happen and what you can do about it.


Bullying Adults In The Workplace

https://www.pinnaclehealth.org/wellness-library/blog-and-healthwise/blog-home/post/bullying-adults-in-the-workplace


  • Addresses the question, “What is workplace bullying?” And what you can do to promote your own mental and emotional health.


75% Of Workers Are Being Bullied - Here’s What To Do About It

https://www.forbes.com/sites/christinecomaford/2016/08/27/the-enormous-toll-workplace-bullying-takes-on-your-bottom-line/#2857e4af5595


How To Stop A Workplace Bully In Their Tracks

https://www.forbes.com/sites/christinecomaford/2014/03/12/bust-workplace-bullies-and-clear-conflict-in-3-essential-steps/#6bf92d207912



References


1. Bullying. (n.d.). Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://www.apa.org/topics/bullying/


2. Bullying and Cyberbullying. (2020, February 14). Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/bullying-and-cyberbullying.htm


3. Adult bullying: Survey finds 31% of Americans have been bullied as an adult - Doctors That DO: Doctors of Osteopathic Medicine. (2019, September 27). Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://doctorsthatdo.osteopathic.org/adult-bullying-survey-finds-31-americans-bullied-adult


4. Adult Bullying. (2015, July 7). Retrieved February 29, 2020, from http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/content/adult-bullying.html


5. Comaford, C. (2016, September 20). 75% Of Workers Are Affected By Bullying -- Here’s What To Do About It. Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/christinecomaford/2016/08/27/the-enormous-toll-workplace-bullying-takes-on-your-bottom-line/#26b059c35595


6. https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/bullying-factsheet508.pdf


7. Patchin, J. W., Adrian, Adrian, Heman, Heman, & Grace. (2019, July 10). Summary of Our Cyberbullying Research (2004-2016). Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://cyberbullying.org/summary-of-our-cyberbullying-research


8. Gini, G. (2014, August 6). Bullying and Suicide Risk in Children and Adolescents. Retrieved February 29, 2020, from https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/article-abstract/1892227


9. https://nces.ed.gov/pubs2017/2017064.pdf



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